This is what the Dutch do with their spare time.

There can’t be much to do in the Netherlands. How else do you explain anyone having the time to come up with this plan?

Of course, it’s one thing devising a self-propelled motorcycle swing. That’s just a matter of finding a bar with a gigantic quantity of beer on tap and drinking long enough for someone to say “I’ve had an idea.”

But actually implementing the idea is another matter, because you need access to a crane from which to dangle the bike and act as a pivot, a long length of sturdy cord, and a bike. Given how the whole enterprise probably started, though, those things could easily have been procured in exchange for a gigantic quantity of beer.

Then, of course, you need a rider. And I’m sure you can guess how you find a volunteer - it truly is amazing what a frothy beverage will buy. 

The technique to get the swing swinging is exactly the same as it is on any other swing. It’s all about building momentum. Only instead of using body weight, you use the power of the bike, opening the throttle until the swing picks the bike up off the ground. The bigger the swing, the longer bike is on the ground, allowing you to use more power and swing even higher. You just need to make sure the clutch is in on the back-swing, or else you’ll lunch the gearbox.

And then you need to keep the weight distribution even. The rider here doesn’t, just as the swing’s starting to get really big, resulting in a mildly terrifying wobble. It probably would have been wise to wear a helmet.

Having done this, the next logical step would be to use a car, because that couldn’t possibly be a bad idea. I mean, this went so well.



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